Your very own Agony Auntie.
I love giving Advice. Who doesn't?
Both solicited and unsolicited. Low emotional stakes so:
Take all things with a grain of salt.
If you'd like to ask the Mistress of Metphor anything,
she'll happily share her opinion about it with you, give you an NCEA excellence worthy
metaphor for your own future use and probably won't be an
ash-hole about it (unlike the rest of the interweb).
Dear Aunt Agony,
I am at home homeschooling my two younger kids. I am between jobs …
have had a holiday and the start of my new job postponed or cancelled by this lockdown.
It feels churlish to be even complaining as I know many MANY
have it harder at the moment. And I know there is no way around
this lockdown . Our days are descending into endless fighting and
whining by lunchtime and I am often in tears . I am trying to do a few outside
things and school things and craft things each day but by lunchtime.
I’m utterly exhausted and have nothing left to give.
I am becoming a horrible shouting mother. Help!
Reply:
Yup. Lockdown sux.
Honestly, it doesn't matter that it's worse for other people.
You're allowed to grieve and lick your wounds, too. You need to.
You are not a horrible mother. The fact that you are judging yourself as
such suggests you are not one. Horrible mothers don't spend much time worry
about being horrible until they are on the up after rock bottom.
The key is to lower your expectations during lockdown.
Further.
Nope- lower.
Lower.
Keep going.
Lower!!!!!
...there you go. Right down here.
Homeschooling is vastly overrated. Don't worry too much about the
kids falling 'behind' the abritrary hoops we've invented for them to jump
through. Learning is learning. 11 hours of screentime a day still leaves 13 for sleep
and problem-solving boredom. Self-directed learning at its finest.
As for you: Coffee (or tea or water) outside...stat!!! And at least once a day.
What 5 filling your cup activies can you schedule into your day??? I've had to schedule
mine into my clendar with timed alerts because I lost my cool so many times in the first
few days of lockdown.
Suggestions might include:
1. Hot bath/shower
2. Meditate (I used guided options on Insight Timer)
3. An epsiode of a light, amusing, lowstakes comedy
4. Masterbate. (spelling intentional? Important to master yourself)
5. Write or Read.
6. Play music.
7. Stretch
8.Go outside alone.
You're doing good. You made people. You have a job (even if it is postponed).
You're crying instead of punching someone. These are all wins.
Celebrate the wins!!! Know that we are all yelling banshees.
xAuntie A
I am at home homeschooling my two younger kids. I am between jobs …
have had a holiday and the start of my new job postponed or cancelled by this lockdown.
It feels churlish to be even complaining as I know many MANY
have it harder at the moment. And I know there is no way around
this lockdown . Our days are descending into endless fighting and
whining by lunchtime and I am often in tears . I am trying to do a few outside
things and school things and craft things each day but by lunchtime.
I’m utterly exhausted and have nothing left to give.
I am becoming a horrible shouting mother. Help!
Reply:
Yup. Lockdown sux.
Honestly, it doesn't matter that it's worse for other people.
You're allowed to grieve and lick your wounds, too. You need to.
You are not a horrible mother. The fact that you are judging yourself as
such suggests you are not one. Horrible mothers don't spend much time worry
about being horrible until they are on the up after rock bottom.
The key is to lower your expectations during lockdown.
Further.
Nope- lower.
Lower.
Keep going.
Lower!!!!!
...there you go. Right down here.
Homeschooling is vastly overrated. Don't worry too much about the
kids falling 'behind' the abritrary hoops we've invented for them to jump
through. Learning is learning. 11 hours of screentime a day still leaves 13 for sleep
and problem-solving boredom. Self-directed learning at its finest.
As for you: Coffee (or tea or water) outside...stat!!! And at least once a day.
What 5 filling your cup activies can you schedule into your day??? I've had to schedule
mine into my clendar with timed alerts because I lost my cool so many times in the first
few days of lockdown.
Suggestions might include:
1. Hot bath/shower
2. Meditate (I used guided options on Insight Timer)
3. An epsiode of a light, amusing, lowstakes comedy
4. Masterbate. (spelling intentional? Important to master yourself)
5. Write or Read.
6. Play music.
7. Stretch
8.Go outside alone.
You're doing good. You made people. You have a job (even if it is postponed).
You're crying instead of punching someone. These are all wins.
Celebrate the wins!!! Know that we are all yelling banshees.
xAuntie A